In The Mind Of A.E.M

Something like this… a love like this… it’s worth fighting for… and that’s why I’m still here to this day. Mistakes, words that should have been left unsaid, the stupid fights.. it doesn’t matter cause as I told you before, and I’ll tell you again… I’d rather go through war with you, then spend one day without you.

Katie Ann Rundell, I love you.

I used to hate October, but you made me love it,

The 8^th of every month, I place nothing else above it.

Cause baby you helped me to keep my head up,

And I work so one day you can come home and just kick ya feet up.

How does a love so right - end up so wrong?

Leaving the heart lost – not knowing how to be strong.

I don’t know, but I’ll tell you what love has done to me,

It gave me hope and it set me free.

Cause, you deserve the best, you’re such a blessing,

God’s work of art, coming straight down from heaven.

I still remember the day I asked you to finally be my girl,

You were wearing a pirate’s costume, but from that moment on you became my world.

You’re flaws and all never mattered to me,

All I saw was a beautiful woman who was my meant to be.

But shit happened and you just walked away,

Even though you said you’d stick through it all every day.

Look baby, I know your past has your heart still damaged,

And when I made my mistake it’s like it ripped off the bandage.

But I’ll never be like any of the niggas from your past,

This love we built it was true – it was made to last.

If I have to wait for you for forever then that’s what I’ll do,

It may end up killing me but at least I would die fighting for you.

And I know you’re gonna say, “it’s not up to me - you chose to lie”, “you fucked it up”

“And I gave you so many chances to earn back my trust”.

But baby, what I need you to realize is I didn’t lie for hell of it,

I just didn’t know how to tell I lost my job and had to move, I felt like a worthless piece of shit.

I was embarrassed and honestly didn’t know what I was gonna do,

I should have came to you first hand but I chose to hide it from you.

Until I figured my shit out and got back on my feet,

But you found it out and basically kicked me to the back seat.

I’m sorry, for lying to you and not telling you straight up,

I guess I should have looked at the bigger picture – instead of close-up.

The point is, I made a mistake, but nothing to throw a love away over,

What we have is lucky, like the rare finding of a 4 leaf clover.

Not everybody in the world will ever find what we’ve shared,

And when a love like this ends – a heart can never be repaired.

Whoever said time heals all wounds lied,

Cause when it comes to true love, that shit never dies.

I get that you don’t want to wait for me anymore,

But never forget the best things in life are worth waiting for.

What’s the point of letting go if we both know that we aren’t gonna find better,

Two souls in one heart beat, you know we fit together.

You once told me “No one will ever compare to you”,

My response to that: if it’s not you - no one else will do.

I adore the way you blush when I tell you you’re beautiful cause you don’t know it,

But the way you love me is how you show it.

6 a.m, no curtains, with the sun shining on your face,

No makeup on, so beautiful, my favorite memory I’ll never erase.

You’re one of a kind - the woman I’ve longed for,

No matter what obstacles in the future, you’ll always be the cure.

I wish you would go back and look at the paragraphs you wrote on tumblr,

Then maybe you’d remember what we had and stop this relationship from going under.

Or if you could see the pain in my eyes,

And how every day we don’t talk I die a little more inside.

But no matter what could have been said or done better,

You’re still the woman I love and I mean that forever.

I’ll keep holding on until my days on this earth are through,

Cause you’re the only woman on earth I’ll ever want to puruse.

I know I’m far right now and can’t fly you out here to be with me,

But I’m still working everyday to get my place so we can be.

Happy together again, cause I believe that this is a once in a lifetime love,

The kind to fill your soul with safety, something you can’t just get rid of.

I pray every night that maybe you’re holding on to,

And that you’ll come back and give me the support I need in order to get through,

Every day of working, and finally get a place I can call home,

But only if you’re there too, if not I’m just alone.

Please remember all the good times that we’ve had together,

Endless nights of planning our forever.

We both found exactly what we’ve been looking for our whole life,

The kind of man you’ve needed, and the woman I want to make my wife.

You’ve told me things that you have never told anyone,

And for you – I’d step in front of any gun.

We embraced each other for exactly who we are,

For all our imperfections and every scar.

People would kill to have a relationship like ours even being distant,

We may be far now but we still have a love that’s always consistent.

All our laughs, jokes, and the passion we shared,

I can’t have that with anyone else – it couldn’t be compared.

Late at night when I try to close my eyes to sleep all I can see is your face,

And know that you and I – what I feel for you could never be replaced.

So I’m just praying that you’ll come back to me,

And we can have our life together – living happily.

Cause I love you, but only on the days that end in Y,

And that my love is one of the many reasons why.

I adore you cause every day I fall in love with you all over again,

My lover, my girl, but most importantly my best friend.

I listened to one of your voicemails from when a rough path is what we were going through,

I replayed it over and over when you said “bare with me through this, Manny I love you”.

But when it came to you sticking it out for me,

You didn’t wanna wait anymore so you chose to just up and leave.

My mistake may be what caused this, but your pride is what’s keeping it going on,

Life is full of twists and turns but it’s like you have this love fully drawn out.

But you can’t see that this doesn’t have to be the end of the love we built,

And maybe one day you’ll regret leaving – all you’ll be left with is the guilt.

Of knowing you did have a good man – he just made a mistake,

But he gave you respect love and support every morning you wake.

When it comes to love you gotta outweigh the bad with the good,

And not dwell on the would-a, could-a’s and the should.

Cause life is too short to pass up someone who filled what you’ve been needing,

And when you gave them your heart they immediately stopped the bleeding.

That’s what I thought I did but I guess it just wasn’t enough for you,

And all these words I’m saying now are long overdue.

Cause I’ve been trying to wrap my mind around how you could just drop me,

Make this something bigger than it is but I guess we’ll never agree.

You said one of the things you loved about me most was that no matter what happened I was always there,

And I thought you loved me enough to do the same but I guess I wasn’t clear.

When I said I’m in this for the long run,

Not for when shit gets rough you just up and run.

No love is ever going to be perfect,

But if you truly care enough then whatever happens it’s worth it.

That’s why after almost 3 months of you gone, I’m still here working as hard as I can,

So what maybe you could see the bigger picture and how I’m still the man,

You fell in love with even though I’ve made a mistake,

And try to remember the moments we had together that made your heart race.

But if you’re gonna promise me you’ll never leave, then never leave,

Cause now that you’re gone all I’m left with is unanswered questions, feeling lost, and incomplete.

If you don’t want me anymore and don’t want to be with me and stick it out,

Then tell me, and I’ll leave and let you take the easy route.

But know this, no man will cherish and love you the way I do,

And that’s something that I can promise you.

Cause the way I feel about you - no else will be able to,

Bring that life in your eyes I saw every time I said I love you.

So please do me a favor and listen to your heart,

And how we fell in love from the very start.

September 26^th, I got a message from this girl who said she liked my ink,

And she caught my eye faster than I could blink.

From that moment on nobody else mattered but her,

I had school and work but staying up all night talking was what I preferred.

Cause she was one of a kind and I knew that right away,

So before you go remember all these moments and every reason you’ve stayed.

They easiest thing you can do it to just give up,

But you should never give up on a once in a lifetime love….

(Source: neverbeensohigh)